Guardian
posted by jm at 6:15 PM
Friday, May 18, 2007
About Me
- Name: jm
I am a brilliant creation of the universe formed from the cosmic protoplasm sailing into eternity. I have two hands, two feet, a couple of great ears, and I'm clipping through life at a moderate pace; minding my p*s and q*s, crossing my t*s, dotting every i.
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60 Comments:
beautiful picture
Did you ever read the book I Heard the Owl Call My Name? It was made into a film. Great film that accurately portrays the people and land where i grew up.
When the owl calls your name it means he calls you back to the ancestors, so says the people of my homelands. Death's messenger.
Some years ago a friend called to tell me of the death of her nephew, a young child, thrown from a horse. The family was numb and walking along the wooded driveway toward the house when an owl began calling them. A great sense of peace descended. all is well, he seemed to say.
So, a guardian too.
No, I haven't read the book. Doesn't mean I won't, though, now that it has been recommended here by dear Tseka. :-)
Thank you, JM, for the guardian. Coming here was the last act before embarking back into The Epic. I have stacks of notebooks and scraps of paper to put into the laptap this weekend. (And no other plans for these two days!) Many of the notebooks contain nothing more than disjointed lines of similie and/or metaphor. The idea is, after the bulk of Bird Women is entered, to take a line every morning and use it as a flatform from which to freefall into the story. :-)
I also purchased a refurbed 4x5 Wacom Intuos drawing tablet ($123.00, a steal!) last weekend so I could put my drawings onto the laptop as well.
Whew. A bit of fear. Have summoned Aries from wherever she's been playing, I think she's just down the way and will be here soon.
Tseska, when my father passed over, the mourning dove called for him.
This is good work. :-)
I was beginning to think this day wouldn't come, but it came, and it's the right day. I don't know what that means in terms of transits, but one that's this effortless, and surprising in its richness, sure is sweet.
"Who do I answer to?
The bird, the moment, the begger, the corn; the eyes of the stranger, the eyes of a friend."
peace, peace, peace to one and all. :-)
Hello dear wise ladies. The weekend alternative is here again.
That gave me a strong feeling, tseka, about the owl calling after the child's death. The crows came to me when my mother died.
Coming here was the last act before embarking back into The Epic.
A great undertaking, sige, and perfect timing with Mars in Aries and the Sun going into Gemini.
You know how I've always felt that animals are our teachers and the ones that really stave off our loneliness. Protect us. I think in time man will stop eating them without awareness and this will make a big difference.
The bird, the moment, the begger, the corn; the eyes of the stranger, the eyes of a friend.
I'm atuned to beggers. Good strong image.
I will find the film.
Are you feeling touched by magic jm?
I was just out walking under a deepening cobalt sky, Moon and Venus touching, brilliant, it took my breath for a moment.
Oh my god. How beautiful, tseka.
Yes. There is some magic in the air. This week has been amazing. Truth. Growth. Healing.
I love cobalt. I usually refer to that shade as indigo, but cobalt is a great choice.
There were still roses and amethysts along the ridges. We are close enough to have the Pacific ocean influence the evening sky, indigo comes when the warm tones drain into the sea.
In winter it is different, we get the alpenglow as i would guess you do in Colorado.
Sunrise, sunset, not to be missed here.
And i usually awake in the night for a bit of stargazing. I do so love being older the need for solid sleep has declined.
indigo comes when the warm tones drain into the sea.
Beautiful words.
It's absolutely amazing how the sleep patterns change. I am in the midst of one now. I never thought I would sleep so much less, and I guess at the end we just take catnaps.
Is old age an awakening? We must keep waking up steadily as we live. No wonder we want to push on.
In keeping with this theme,
this week was big for me. This healing that's taking place. I now want to give my attention to the most important things and pursue myself and my goals directly. The Saturn in Virgo is coming in.
It's entirely my doing. How honest I can be with myself and how clear in my actions.
Interesting you and rc are of an age and he has be very sick, we are burning up minutes everyday. It is new for him as he is very rarely ill. All sorts of hidden info is coming up. I am stunned by this bold honesty. 60 is looking very good to me. The after Saturn. Still the last bit over pluto is taking it's toll. Nearly everyone i know has been hit. Right in the chest. Moving old emotion is a lot of it. I love the astro/healing connections.
Me too! The astro healing connection. This is interesting about our beloved seer. I'd like to review his chart. we'll have to take it easy with all of our Sagittarius excitability to get it all covered. But Pluto ending in Sagittarius is ALL about honesty. I really felt it this past week. We are being called into the fore becuase of our Sagittarius placements. Honesty is the way to go now. It can be tempting to get sidetracked in the games, but it will pay off to toe this line now.
I never tire of the astro healing connection and the emotional patterning. That's why I'm a psychological astrologer. It is a gift of great magnitude to have a knowledgeable healer to work with. I feel this with kadimiros too, as his mental understanding and healing instincts are stellar. It's like the pattern in me finding the fit. Not an easy path so far.
JM this is exactly what i feel called to, my Sag bluntness that i usually try hard to temper. I am not so likely to put sugar on the medicine these past few weeks.
Straight no chaser.
It is a wild ride right now isn't it? And all the while we (rc and i) are wondering about our careers which seem to be slipping our of our fingers.
Pluto, man.
Yes, you and Kadimiros
BIG big gifts.
I am beyond grateful to have found you.
Yes!!! Don't worry about the careers. They need to slip to make space. Mine too. It will all come back in a bigger way. I've completely relinquished the grip for now.
my Sag bluntness that i usually try hard to temper. I am not so likely to put sugar on the medicine these past few weeks.
What a relief!!!!!! I've been waiting for this. I'm going full speed ahead on honesty. And even the truth. I've been holding it in for too long while the liars dominate, and I've had enough. I will take all the consequences gladly.
Straight no chaser.
Bottoms up! Cheers! And to your health!
This has been my life story. My honesty was the only thing my family liked about me, yet I always got into trouble with it. So I stuffed it and got used to being phony at times like the others. False flattery especially is a hard one for me. I want the best and don't like to encourage mediocrity and worse. My iconoclasm had gone underground.
Now I'm doing a double take as Pluto seems to like me again and my Sagittarian bluntness. This absolutely fine by me.
Well i usually present myself with a warning to new friends: never ask me how i like your hair. I will tell you.
If there is one thing that our generation can pass to the one following us it will be this gift. Honesty. I am soooooooo sick of this Niiiicce crap. And the pouty lower lip that goes with it. I'm not overlooking it anymore.
Funny i never see you as blunt just clear. clarity is such a rare gift.
well i need to shift myself to that horizontal position, my peeper are giving up.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart for the fine input on my bro.
RC did this earlier for me and between the two of you something has snapped into focus for me. I have a feeling you two would like each other.
Oh how wonderful. Clarity. I love this concept. Pure pleasure.
am soooooooo sick of this Niiiicce crap.
Oh yeah.
Last weekend after the Christian rock awakening I think things came to life. That was marvelous. Like a cold dip in a rushing mountain stream, complete with laughter and whoops. This week was exceptional and I intend to continue exactly on this path.
I love RC.
I am very very excited. The love of life of Sagittarius is our birthright. Why not do it?
And I love you.
Get a little light old age sleep and we will continue.
You probably noticed with your eagle eye that the times are off on these last comments. I had to make a correction upthread and repost. It's only me being crazy!
[i]I'm atuned to beggers. Good strong image.[/i]
~~ The Muse thanks you. :-)
I agree with JM's idea to let the careers slip, their slipping is creating (necessary) space. It's an adventure. (That's the "nice" way of putting the experience, ha!)
These past few years have been nothing but slip, slip, slip, sliding into totally new spaces, bumping into everything, everyone. With no boundaries, new ones had to be created around the limited space I found left to call "my own" (as in the old blues song, "God Bless The Child Who's Found His Own"). Honesty, bluntness, are side effects, I think.
And ultimately, no one left to answer to, but "The bird,..." etc. @;-)
I can't say I loved the experience while it was happening (is still happening), but it's been so freeing, even up to, and including, rejoining a new town's matrix.
We're still scrambling for $$. JBK will be lucky if a job opens up several hours away (which will mean renting a studio apartment for the weekdays), health insurance still several weeks away (but I signed up!), I can pay this month's bills. It's enough.
And I found out who around me gave a damn. :-) We did our stint for democracy, for the collective. And discovered that the collective mostly wants their individual names up in lights, $$ for their activism and love of country and ability to follow the narrow streams they've chosen.
Me, I prefer anonymity. Big literary festival in the city yesterday, brand name poets and authors. I stayed home and played with Bird Woman, sat in the swing, cooked for my conservative in-laws.
I believe in art, period. Whatever shape creation takes today.
And I do enjoy coming here, checking in, talking with other artists, seeing what JM's words and pictures and songs have sparked. That I so enjoy. That is what all of you meant to me from the very beginning.
Sige
Perhaps as the Bird Woman bits get woven together (i am so glad to hear that you, a professional writer, are plagued by scraps too-"don't touch that envelope!") Perhaps you will begin a blog or a webpage where you can share under copywrite your poems. I would love to read them. So far what i have seen merits wide appreciation.
You are right about the narrow minded rationales for doing good work. Four years, i volunteered time as an Ombudsman for the Elderly and disabled - mostly in skilled nursing facilities - often in the role of speaking as the client who could not speak for himself. As i went around my community seeking additional volunteers to ease the burden of we few, i heard over and over, "oh, i could never do that" "It would make me so sad" or something similar. They never saw that the comment alone added support to the structure that isolates and demeans those in need.
Hard hearted, cold, or simply able to compartmentalize makes for a community of similar traits. Creativity is the lifeblood of a vibrant society, our best hope of reclaiming, remaking the world in the way we wish to live.
No bigger gift nor responsibility exits than putting our talents forward, though we often would prefer to stay quiet.
When i think about sucessful movements, they didn't start at the top, they started at the bottom, a current of like-minded.
The thought of opening a web/blog site made itself felt this morning, but it would be a lot of work and time that isn't available right now. Sigh. There is a connection that happens when creation is shared that I miss, however, so, time will tell if that is a path that needs cleared.
I think the path now is about creating in silence. What to do with it all is still a big question mark. There is an opportunity to publish the work that is just waiting for me, but that opportunity is, as is everything, limited by time, so first things first, keeping writing. Or in this weekend's case, transfer the scraps to the computer and save to a flash drive as I go. (Envelopes, bits of scrap paper of all sizes including bank deposit sheets, receipts, notebooks with only two pages written on! etc!)
I read what you and JM have to say about marketing, and that is something I'm interested in, because when the pieces are ready for view, I'm going to want them viewed. Scattershot, if need be.
Thank you for the encouragement. :-)
A realization! by transfering the scraps to digital, and buying a Wacom, perhaps this is a bigger change than I thought. I will keep all the scriblings and drawings and paintings, but I'm gearing to create with this one tool, this laptop. For instance, all dreams and morning pages are now recorded via keyboard, instead of pen.
Was this organic? How could i have not noticed this before?! A transition. Another threshold.
As others have said, what I enjoy about JR and RU are the juxtopositions of JM's thoughts and the images she chooses.
I think we all are pieces of a puzzle that are finding one another. Even though our artistic maps are entirely different, there seems to be a growing need for the artist's offerings. Offerings since they have a hard time releasing money! They will. You mentioned, sige, the money in the political game and I agree. It's astonishing to see where the money goes.
So maybe our network can help. We need to keep it up no matter what, especially now. I think opportunity is ahead and this is a blind passage.
As long as we keep working, the techniques will unfold and reveal themselves. I find that seemingly disconnected activities are part of the whole thing, too.
Creativity is the lifeblood of a vibrant society, our best hope of reclaiming, remaking the world in the way we wish to live.
We've got to do it. This is beautiful.
No bigger gift nor responsibility exits than putting our talents forward, though we often would prefer to stay quiet.
When i think about sucessful movements, they didn't start at the top, they started at the bottom, a current of like-minded.
I'm being literally pulled from my silence. The current gets stronger with each individual that enters the flow.
Some of us are shell-shocked right now from our society's emotional violence, but we'll recover.
"Some of us are shell-shocked right now from our society's emotional violence, but we'll recover."
I understand that, I do. You know how long I've been doing the detach, and I'm happy to report, I'm finally there. It was like quitting smoking, it took me years, and numerous trys to quit, before one day I put the smokes down and didn't pick them back up again.
Never say never of course, but I love this land of detach. I feel so free. Who knew, you know? And you know what else? I feel like I left when my work was done. There isn't any lingering feeling of leaving something unfinished, it was just over, so onward, elsewhere.
It took time to process the emotions. I thought I might have to put them somewhere, turn them into something, but no. The emotions faded so much faster than I could have imagined.
I have no desire to write about politics, or the environment, or religion, or all the etcs, ever again. The subjects might show up in my short stories and poems, but as side notes, condensed, part of the story, not the main.
Good luck, you know?!
The other thing about this, interesting to me, is while long ago I realized I could no longer listen or watch the chaos, so no television, it has been quite awhile now where I've realized I can no longer read. Me, a born reader. I can't read news anymore. My brain shuts off at the headline. It's a physical thing. Very odd. But I'm grateful!
And, if I had time to go into it (gotta get ready for work!) I'd wax on here about the collective and the internets creating an entire new batch of informed warriors, and my thoughts that those of us more bent to the arts can let go, because really, those warriors have taken over, and they won't be led by old timers anymore than anyone else.
I don't want to be part of their mistakes and growth. Selfish of me, but hey. Why kill myself in a medium that doesn't really welcome innovation anymore than any other part of society?
Bottom line, my work is my work. @;-)
hugs for the day!
I don't want to be part of their mistakes and growth. Selfish of me, but hey. Why kill myself in a medium that doesn't really welcome innovation anymore than any other part of society?
Man, are you right.
Only the very very few are ahead of the pack. Group mentality keeps dominating and tends to get lower and lower as it goes.
They know not. I'm here now but probably will move on as I usually do. There seems to be a tiny bit of hope at the moment but group pressure is strong to bring them into the undertow.
I don't have a TV and I've stopped reading. It's too painful.
Hugs to you too!
JM,
It looks to me like your work (on the blogs) is part of your artist nature. I read the astrology threads, and see how valuable and insightful what you write is to others. I don't understand enough about astrology to understand, but it's clear from the responses that what you're writing is innovative and important.
This is so encouraging, sige. I always feel like I'm swimming against the current and sometimes feel like giving up. I've been trying to get good innovative astrology out there forever, so your words give me motivation to continue.
The whole collective situation hurts and the only solution is individual health. Astrology helps this, but it amazes me how they resist the growth and focus on the useless. Why? What is the gain? Belonging? Encouraging incompetency and refusing to help them get better if they can be. Staying on the lower levels creating dead weight. Following everyone but themselves. I shouldn't worry about them but the volume is so loud.
The best thing to do, I suppose, is just put it out there as an option and be patient. How in the world could they miss it forever? Well, anything is possible.
They can have it for free right here if they want the real thing.
Glad you see it. One leads to another.
Just amazing all you create JM! Where do you get all those original images?
It´s my first time here today plus have been looking today at all your friends sites too - Tseka´s art is amazing, Neith is so sharp and right on with her comments, liked her astro articles a lot. Donnie makes me laugh, were did he get that new Lady Liberty from? What a creative and genuine group! Guess I keep coming back so much because of my need to get in touch with my own NN Taurus that I feel and see so expressed in both your sites.
Thanks again for all those astrological insights, have kept a lot in some archives, it´s material to read over and over.
About the owl, or birds and messages. When someone dies, a falcon always comes to my mother´s home, real close, and she always gets a bit nervous and says “that bird was here again, someone has died”.
As english isn´t my first language, I was wondering today about the meaning of “Raging Universe”. I only knew raging as from rage, checked it in the dictionary and it gave two meanings: 1. Causing great pain or distress.
2. Extraordinary, tremendous. Interesting polarity! Was that intentional?
Should have posted this over on Raging Universe, oh well, just wanted to say hello over here,
ah, I do have Sag rising and a very sensitive Moon in Pisces, I take slow steps at the moment ...
Hope you don´t mind my being here ... well, enjoying myself ....
Analysa
Analysa!!! I'm thrilled. This is our not so secret cave and you are so welcome. Sag rising and Pisces Moon. Excellent. The Pisces Moon is something else. Adds to the emotional pain of the Scorpio SN, but allows transcendance if you choose. Jazzrap is a soothing balm for the sensitive. Tseka has a lot of Pisces, and sige and I are Cancer troubled. All sponges that need to get away at times. I created jazzrap for free association and in depth discussions, a lot about our creative struggles in a brutal world. I thought special people would arrive one by one.
I think birds are messengers, and often bridge the worlds of life and death.
Amazing that English isn't your native language. I never would have guessed.
I get the images from books and magazines. I have an unusual eye, so I see things that most miss.
I love Sagittarius rising. It's a fortunate sign, especially on the Ascendant. The Pisces Moon likes retreat and at jazzrap you can get that and not be lonely.
You'll love it here.
It feels like one of those encounters that will last a long time & comes from way way back ...
my little heart is excited!
Hugs and welcomes.
I've been thinking. I usually get ready to bail with my SN in Scorpio expecting the upsetting end. This time I think I might hold on, stay here, steady and center myself, and embrace completely my unmoving NN in Taurus. Relax and stay still.
It so good to talk about this.
Oh, and on the Raging Universe title. That's a good question. The polarity was not intentional and this is wonderful information. Turning the distress into productivity.
I can look at the upsetting ends and I look at the good ends, but it is always the good ends where my power is at and with Mars in Leo or God knows what, I´ve pulled myself out over and over of the sticky molases of pain.
I was (am?) a big heart chakra healer, healing the hell out of everything till I got so burned out and finally understood that being a crutch for anyone just doesn´t help.
Still, when I look at the big polarities of life I can feel all the pain. Pulling my energy into my third eye, where my neutrality is, helps me stay detached. When I watch or read the news I do it that way, train myself not to get pulled in.The only thing about the news is that I find them boring,so I take them in small doses.
Where I tend to fail is when I see animals suffer, just gets me
Going to bed now, I´m over in Europe and its real late
Europe????
Sleep soundly, analysa.
I never would have dreamed that English isn't your first language, analysa.
I always refer to Raging Universe as Raging University because I learn so much from it and everyone who comments.
I find it interesting that your name, analysa, is just one letter different from analyse, to examine something in depth to unlock secrets or gain more information. That's very much what we do here and at Raging University. :o)
I, too, noticed the name choice and was enchanted.
University sounds great, I hope you don´t mind first graders....with all that lack of refinement ...
With a few languages in my background, it takes me much too long to write a comment, but I think it has more to do with botteling up too many emotions ... ha ha!
.... so here comes Analysa from analyzing .... have been taking a looong tour on this site past posts ....
“jm said...
I'm wondering if the nodes must be somehow shared among soul families not purely ancestral ones.
Oh yes. Absodamn. There is a familiarity beyond the personal when this occurs. And and immediate urge to connect and stay connected because of the valuable information being exchanged. Soul memory is how Buz Myers referred to it, and he was tops.
Analysa said...
It feels like one of those encounters that will last a long time & comes from way way back ..."
So that is the deja vu
maybe I should stop posting for a bit at jazzrap and the university, be a good beginner student and catch up on all that great material, taking so much space here
so joe, I do have an accent, the name, well, it wasn´t intentional, but that is so magical now. I think though more than analyze, I feel .....
.....skipping away ....
The nodes are highly connected karmically. I actually think all of our encounters are connected to soul memory and our evolution, but the good ones we want to keep. The idea of the NN in Taurus is to single out ths good ones, let go of the negative.
As for taking space, the thing is infinite as far as I've noticed.
Arrivng here at your sites has really lit me up.I´m just getting a sense how special they are, thank you.
You're so welcome, analysa. Relax, kick off your shoes, and enjoy. It never ends here.
JM, I DO think it is so important to keep talking, writing, singing, painting, knitting our stories. Wellspring of wisdom are so important to travelers, especially in the desert of misunderstanding and emotional riots.
Keep on keepin' on, :-)
Hiya, Analysa!
Hey Siege, hey JM, Hey Tseka,
I was re-reading some of your conversation again from this post.
siege “ I stayed home and played with Bird Woman, sat in the swing, cooked for my conservative in-laws.I believe in art, period. Whatever shape creation takes today.”
..... well, some people consider cooking one of the highest art, like in Japanese temple cooking, food is the entrance to the spirit world .....
jm said...
This is so encouraging, sige. I always feel like I'm swimming against the current and sometimes feel like giving up. I've been trying to get good innovative astrology out there forever, so your words give me motivation to continue.
Analysa said
Let me tell you my experience with Raging Universe, jm. I was real busy in my life when I first came across your site, didn´t read there that much, always liked the pictures - and they attracted me back again and again, so much sensuality! Knew a bit about my overal chart and transits, little about my SN and NN.I reached a new layer of the onion being peeled, a process I had gone through numerous times but never at such a deep level. This time I had to do it without any outside help, had to really learn to listen to the heart of my being. When I read your SN article on Scorpio, it really hit me, it was such a confirmation of what I´d been feeling, same with the NN Taurus, it brought up old pain and a lot of joy. I felt overwhelmed. It was all so fast and clear suddenly. On a walk tonight I released an inmense amount of responsability from my space and opened up to a lot of joy. Somewhere you said your father used to say “enough is too much”, my teachers taught me “ take only 80 % of your capacity”. What you had given me with those articles was more than enough and I´m still enjoying all that I process internally because of them.
I didn´t mean to upset you by not accepting your astrology insights into my own chart, I didn´t even know that was one of the hidden treasures I could find here. With all that got lit up, I was busy ! I already look forward to them, and in time I know I would like a consultation, I hope you do those.
In oriental diagnosis my best teacher taught me, “ you don´t do diagnosis, you recieve diagnosis, it just comes to you. You can´t force it. The more you try, the less you see.”
It has been the same with my healing over the years, I always wanted to come to the deepest point, I knew something major was off, but I couldn´t see it, feel it or force it, it´s a process that took time to unfold. The time gave me the depth that I needed.
So jm, I´ve been swimming against the current all my life as well, and it is hard, I know. But it is the only path there is, the other one would be destrucction. So it is actually the easier path.
What was that with the baskets ? The best things in life are free ? Take as much as you like ? I have a lot to catch up, but I made my order ...
I see a very bright future, finally we can shine our Light
my teachers taught me “ take only 80 % of your capacity”.
This is amazing.
I´ve been swimming against the current all my life as well, and it is hard, I know. But it is the only path there is, the other one would be destrucction. So it is actually the easier path.
Another amazing one.
Thank you for these analysa.
I see a very bright future
This is Sagittarius Rising in a nutshell, the destiny of faith and optimism regardless of the details. Good and bad will always happen but Sagittarius sees it all as experience and doesn't differentiate. She takes advantage of the opportunity to grow and learn and embraces life with enthusiasm and trust that it all works out.
Most Sagittarians question others' systems of thought so it's natural to look at astrology and what-not with a keen eye. They weigh and judge for themselves. They trust their own perceptions most of all. I like this part. I have a lot of Sag in me and I know I know. They are not followers. Not the sag parts. Pisces needs direction, but your own Sagittarius can provide it as you grow.
Sagittarius is born to figure it out well.
Took your advice on slow & easy. I´ll have my little story soon.
I was reading the energies of Raging Universe and Jazzrap cafe these last two days.
I found it quite interesting, RU is like a very modern, eclectic, somewhat urban space, very laid back, large contemporary couches, all very white, simple and very large space, has a very high vibration, I don´t feel any rigid academic energy (thank God!).
When I looked at jazzrap cafe, I saw the total opposite, all black, no shape or form. I thougt I was blocked and couldn´t see anything, then I realized, ah! this makes perfect sense, this is the Void, the Darkness where raw creative energy exists, the source of the energy for artists. No wonder I´m here too, with all that needs to be unblocked.
Interesting energies .... Do you also work with the tarot? I wondered ....Where you born in the year of the monkey?
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